5 Things I've learned during my little girl's first year

Today is my daughter's first birthday.  Wow! Time flies by quicker the older I get.  My grandparents always talked about time speeding up when I was a kid, and with each passing year I realize that they were right.

As a dad to three boys before my baby girl was born, I thought that I had a pretty good handle on this "kid thing."  Little did I realize the changes that have occured in the decade since Andrew, my youngest son, was born. So, I thought it would be fun to outline some of these differences in honor of Isabella's first birthday:

1. I am a decade older!  This should be obvious, but was not something that I had considered prior to her birth.  Play time on the floor, rides on by back in the backpack carrier, and getting a baby in and out of a carseat were things that seemed simple a few years ago.  Now however, my knees crack, my back tightens, and my joints ache.
2. Products have changed.  While diapers and wipes haven't changed much, car seats, baby food "pouches", and safety gadgets exist that were not "necessary" previously.
3. Having a girl softened my heart.   Raising three boys comes naturally.  We wrestle, throw the ball, play with cars and trucks, and watch super hero movies and cartoons.  Perhaps the natural progression of raising boys, watching "manly" movies like Gladiator and Top Gun, and becoming somewhat callused as a result of life not going the way I always assumed it would, had hardened my heart.  However, on this day one year ago, my heart melted and it will never be the same.  When my daughter cries, my first reaction is not "brush it off" like it has been for the first fourteen years as a parent.  Now I have learned that sometimes the appropriate response is to pick her up and give her a hug assuring her that everything is going to be ok.
4. I am born to protect.  I've known this for a while due to my role as a husband, but there is something different once you have a daughter.  There is a deep desire within me to make sure that my daughter feels safe when I am around.  Although this instinct exists with my boys, the intensity is greater with a daugther.  I am like a lion ready to protect her from the "troubles of this world"
5. It's important to slow down.  Some of this lesson comes with age, but most can be attributed to the fact that I realize it's ok to enjoy life.  Climbing the ladder, meeting a deadline, getting that next promotion means nothing if those around you never see you enjoying the life God has provided.  Too often we try to multi-task our way through life.  Checking email, twitter, Facebook, while driving to the next appointment, and all in the name of efficiency.  Children, especially girls, do not operate this way.  Isabella Grace is fully engaged in one activity at a time.  She gives her full attention to the task in front of her.  She moves on quickly, but with each moment that toy, that cartoon, or that food in front of her is the MOST important thing at the time.  We all could learn from this determination and devotion. 

Ultimately what I've learned during this first year is that all my children are different.  They all have needs and I get the blessing and honor of trying to meet some of them.  I will not always do the right thing.  I have made many mistakes, but my love and dedication to the well-being of each of them cannot be questioned.  The most important things in my life can be summed up in one picture:

 

So whether it is teaching my 3 boys to treat people with respect, walk with honor, and make the world around them a better place, or teaching my daughter that she can do anything she sets her mind to, that she is NOT defined by appearance alone, and that she is worth more than gold, I will live my life each day striving to be better than the one before.  I will never stop trying to provide a better life, but most of all, I will never stop teaching them of the love and grace of Jesus who makes all the lessons I've learned worth it!!  Happy Birthday Isabella Grace!

Life Lessons and THings to Ponder from "A Christmas Story"

I am proud to admit that I am one of those people that watches A Christmas Story annually and can quote dialogue from the movie.  It is a classic movie in the true meaning of the word and on this 30th anniversary of its release I found myself pondering lessons learned that can be applied to our lives.

 

Lesson 1: Pray Big Prayers-Ask for Exactly what you want.  Ralphie knew without a doubt that he wanted an official Red Ryder, carbine action, two-hundred shot range model air rifle!

 

Lesson 2: Persistence Pays Off-Ralphie tries many ways to convince his parents that the BB gun would be the ideal gift and in the end, he gets what his heart desired.  Even when people tell you that you'll shoot your eye out, don't give up!  Remember, Ralphie does end up shooting his eye out in the end, BUT it isn't a disaster after all.

 

Lesson 3: Multiple Roads can lead to Success-Ralphie realizes that there are people in his world that are in his parents sphere of influence that may change their gift buying ideas including his teacher and of course the big man himself: Santa.  When working through a problem or difficult situation, don't put all your eggs in one basket.  Include multiple options and methods into the decision making because you never know which one will ultimately work.

Lesson 4: Rewards are Motivating-We can't all win lamps for a "Major Award" like the old man, but he sure was pleased with himself when he won.  Whether parenting or managing a business, remember that people like to be rewarded.  Provide those you are trying to motivate with rewards that are meaningful for their efforts.

 

Lesson 5: Gimmicks fizzle out-Ralphie was so excited to decode his first secret message from Annie's radio broadcast only to discover it was a thinly veiled marketing message.  Don't keep your loved ones or employees hanging on with gimmicks.  Be available.  Follow through on what you say you are going to do.  Live up to the promises you make.  Under promise and over deliver in the end!!

 

Lesson 6: Best intentions and planning don't always work out-Remember when the Bumpus hounds from next door somehow get in and eat the turkey and the family has to go out for Chinese food on Christmas?  If your best laid plans are destroyed, do something else and embrace it.  That Chinese turkey turned out to be pretty memorable after all.  This is definitely the hardest one for me personally.  I miss my 3 boys, who live with their mom in another state, and try to make plans that sometimes don't work.  I hope each year for the plans to work out better than the last, yet something always seems to happen that I didn't expect.  In the end, God seems to always work it out and Christmas on the 28th or 29th of the month is just as special as if they were here on Christmas day!

 

Final lesson:  Embrace Life-Speak words of life to those around you.  Be a blessing!  Make the most of every situation.  Cause remember this might just be: " That Christmas would live in our memories... as the Christmas when we were introduced to Chinese turkey.
All was right with the world."

 

Jesus loves you and all is right with the world if He is in the center of yours!  Merry Christmas!!

 

The Changing of the Seasons

As I took this photo this weekend, I found myself reflecting on the changes that come with each season of the year.  The leaves on the bush have changed from a lush green to vibrant red, yellow, and orange.  Before long, the leaves will turn brown and finally fall to the ground.  The leaves will give way to colder temperatures and winter will take their place.

Just as these changes occur in the weather naturally, our lives face changes on various scales daily.  My wife asked me a question that continued my contemplative mood: "If you could go back in time to when you were 20 without gaining any knowledge you've learned, would you want to go back and try again?"  I can honestly say that I would NOT want to go back.  I have made plenty of mistakes along the way these last seventeen plus years, but I am in a place in my life where I am happy with the season I am in.  The last year of my life has been one of many changes.  I married an amazing woman that loves me the way I am, but encourages me to become evene better.  My world was then changed even further with the birth of my beautiful daughter, Isabella Grace, pictured above.  As if those two life changes were not enough, we also threw in a career change for me and a new business start-up for my wife.  When the Todd family decides to make a change, we move from the calm of Spring to the snow of Winter as if it were nothing.

 

The one thing that I have learned through all the changes is to appreciate the change!  I am embracing the changing colors in the leaves, rather than lamenting the loss of the heat of summer that the golfer in me longs for throughout the year.  I encourage each of you to embrace the change.  I know many of you reading this think that is impossible.  Change can be hard, but trying to avoid it or ignore it will only make it worse.

 

But by avoiding change, we create even bigger problems such as lost opportunites, broken relationshiops, or sometimes a waste of our talent and purpose.  Millions of people who need change are drifting along with no real purpose, no joy, and feeling as if they are traveling down a dead end street.  The only way to make the changes that we all desire is to include God in our transformation.  He created us in His image and desires the best for us.  All we have to do is call out to him and Believe!  The great news about that dead end street you are walking down is that it is not a one way street....turn around.  Make the change you know you are being called to make.  Live the life you were intended to live. 

 

Take time to embrace the changes in yourself and those that occur naturally around you.  The freedom that you will experience from this acceptance is an amazing feeling.  God has a plan for your life. 

 

 

 

 

Thank you to everyone who takes the time to read my ramblings.  If you enjoy them, please take time to share and comment.  Also, if you have a topic that you think I should write about I would love your suggestions.

 

 

GT